9.21: Mess

Asher could feel Landon watching him almost nervously as the two of them made their way up the walkway toward the small house. He was excited to finally visit Landon’s house for the first time, but the strange looks Landon had been giving him were very distracting.

It was a lot less stressful than feeling the stares Ollie had been giving him during the past two days since their fight, but it still put Asher a bit on-edge. What was Landon so worried about?

“Everything okay?” He asked softly as he neared the front door. “You said your parents aren’t home, right?” From what Asher understood, bringing a guy home would be a very bad idea if Landon’s father was there, but there hadn’t been any other cars out front when they’d arrived.

Landon shook his head. “Nah, they both work pretty late.” He reminded him. That was the whole reason they’d opted to hang out at Landon’s house in the first place — the privacy. “It’s just, um… I’m sorry it’s not all fancy like your place.” He gestured up toward the house as he spoke, clearly embarrassed. “My parents… They don’t work in Hollywood, y’know?”

It was Asher’s turn for embarrassment. He was so used to comparing his home to Oliver’s that he’d never really considered the fact that his parents were much wealthier than the norm. And, come to think of it, so were Lily’s. It was something Asher had always taken for granted… and having it pointed out to him was incredibly uncomfortable.

“You really think I care about that?” He asked. It was hard not to feel hurt. Did Landon think of him as some kind of rich snob or something?

“I know you don’t… But I kinda do.” Landon admitted with a shrug as he finally put his key in the lock and led the way inside. 

Asher barely even took the time to look around as they crossed the threshold and entered the modest living room and dining area. He was too concerned with what Landon had said. “Please… Promise me you’ll stop worrying about it.” He said seriously. “You could live in a freaking cardboard box and I wouldn’t give a shit.”

Landon laughed softly. “I know… I’m being stupid. I don’t know how the hell you manage to do this to me.” He shook his head slowly, taking a seat on the large sofa in the middle of the room.

“Do what?”

“Make me so nervous.”

This time, it was Asher who laughed. “Seriously? I make you nervous? Are you kidding me?”

Landon smiled. ”I don’t think I’ve ever liked anybody as much as I like you.”

Though Asher’s heart leapt at these words, he couldn’t shake the slight twinge of sadness he felt too. “Not even Riley?” He asked softly. 

Still reeling from his argument with Oliver, Asher had spent the past couple of days distracting himself with the mystery of ‘Riley’, and had finally reached the only logical conclusion — that he was Landon’s ex-boyfriend.

The other boy’s smile faded instantly, confirming his suspicions. “That was different.” Landon replied carefully. “And it was a long time ago…”

That didn’t sound like a ‘no’. Asher let out a soft sigh, but said nothing. He had so many more questions now about Landon’s ex, but he was too afraid to ask any of them. It was so strange to think that Landon had been with someone else before him… maybe even loved him. How the hell am I ever gonna live up to this other guy?!

It was as though Landon could read his mind. He reached out, taking Asher’s hands gently in his. They were rough, but warm. It was nice. “Look, I’m not gonna lie. Riley was…” He paused, as though searching for the right word. “He meant a lot to me. But it’s over now.”

For a moment, Asher found himself thinking of Oliver, though he could not explain exactly why. He did his best to push the thought out of his mind as he opened his mouth to speak once more.

“You promise?” Asher felt so stupid and embarrassed as the question passed his lips. “I mean… I mean like… You don’t still… Y’know. You’re ‘over him’, or whatever?” 

Landon nodded, smiling softly at him. “Asher, I’m with you now. And if it helps, I’ve liked you for a hell of a lot longer than I liked him.” He confessed.

“You have?” Asher asked hopefully. His jealousy had still not yet abated, but he did his best to push it to the back of his mind for now, alongside those puzzling thoughts of his best friend. 

Landon nodded. “I wasn’t lying before — I’ve liked you for… forever, basically. I just never thought you liked me too…”

“Well, in case you haven’t noticed, I do.” Asher couldn’t help but smile. “A lot.”

“I know…” Landon replied softly, leaning closer and closer until Asher’s lips met his.

Asher’s heart skipped a beat — as always, kissing Landon quite literally took his breath away. Landon’s kisses were so passionate and intense — sometimes it was difficult for Asher to keep up. He hadn’t kissed anyone since he’d dated Lily, and that was over two years ago now. He was pretty rusty, to say the least, but he was glad he had at least some experience to go off of. The last thing he wanted was for Landon to think he didn’t know what he was doing.

It wasn’t until about a minute or so into their makeout session that a thrilling and terrifying thought crossed Asher’s mind. He pulled away slightly to come up for air. “Know what I just realized?” He whispered between kisses.

“What?” Landon asked, just as breathless as he was.

“We’re all alone…” It was literally the first time the two of them had been truly, completely alone together before. Even when Landon came to Asher’s house, his parents had been home.

But not this time. It was just the two of them.

“I know…” Landon’s devilish smile sent a shiver of excitement through Asher’s entire body, though it lingered in one area in particular…

Again, it was almost like Landon was a mind reader. As soon as their lips came back together again, Asher could feel Landon’s hand traveling lower and lower until he was fumbling with the button on his jeans.

Asher’s heart pounded in his chest, a twinge of fear mixed with an overwhelming wave of excitement and anticipation.

Landon pulled his mouth away from his for a moment. “Is this okay?”

Asher nodded in reply, unable to form words as he focused on the feeling of Landon’s warm fingers and palm as they finally made contact. With a smile, Landon leaned forward to kiss him once more as his hand started to get to work.

It was the most incredible thing Asher had ever felt in his life. He’d touched himself more times than he could possibly count, but nothing could ever compare to this. It was incredible.

So incredible, in fact, that, well…

Oh my god. Oh my fucking god. I’m sorry!” In an instant, Asher went from pure bliss to wanting to curl up into a ball and die.

Before Landon even had a chance to reply, he literally sprinted down the hallway and into a room he desperately hoped was the bathroom, awkwardly hitching up his pants as he ran. Luckily, he was right. Asher’s hands were shaking as he turned on the faucet and began trying to clean himself up.

How the hell could he ever face Landon again?! Everything had been going so well, and now he’d made a literal and figurative mess of everything. It was bad enough that he always spewed word-vomit every time he and Landon were together. Now apparently he spewed other things too… Way, way sooner than he should have.

Ugh. I can’t fucking believe it. How could he ever come back from this?

I bet Riley could last more than twenty fucking seconds, he thought bitterly as he re-buttoned his pants. I’m such a goddamn loser.

“Asher?” Landon’s voice called gently from the other side of the bathroom door. “You okay?”

“Y-yeah.” He lied, turning around to face the door. “I just… Fuck, I’m sorry. I think I’m gonna head home.”

“Don’t. Please?” Landon replied. “It’s seriously not a big deal.”

With a heavy sigh, Asher stepped forward to open the door. It felt too strange talking to Landon through a giant panel of wood. He wanted to see his face… even if he wasn’t sure he had the courage to actually look him in the eye.

The sight of Landon’s warm smile helped lift Asher’s spirits a bit. “Hey, let’s go talk in my room or something, okay?” The older boy offered, inclining his head at a door further down the hallway.

“O-okay…” Asher hung his head as he followed, still wishing he could make himself disappear.

Landon’s bedroom was much smaller than Asher thought it would be, and a lot more sparsely decorated too. He didn’t even have his own computer, it seemed. No wonder it’s hard for him to get online and play Bloodwatch. He’s gotta share with his parents!

Asher was reminded for a moment of their conversation from earlier about money, but he quickly pushed the thought from his mind. He had much more important things to worry about right now.

“Landon, I’m sorry.” Asher spoke at last as he took a seat beside Landon on the edge of the bed. Much as he was dreading this conversation, he knew he had to get it over with. “This is so fucking embarrassing. I feel awful.”

Landon shook his head. “It’s fine. Seriously. It’s like, kind of a compliment actually, isn’t it?” He added with a laugh.

But Asher couldn’t even bring himself to smile. He still felt so embarrassed. “It’s just, um… I guess you should probably know… I’ve never… I’ve never like… y’know.”

“I had a feeling.” Landon confessed.

He felt his stomach lurch with nausea and embarrassment as he continued. “So… this is really new for me. And I’m sorry I –”

Landon cut him off with a sigh. “Will you stop saying you’re sorry?” There was a slight edge of annoyance in his voice as he spoke. “Everyone starts off super awkward and shitty at this stuff… Just means you need a little more practice. Which I can totally help you with.” He added with a flirty little smile.

Asher’s heart already felt a little lighter at his words. Landon was being so understanding about this whole thing. How the hell did he get so lucky? “Thanks.” He replied at last. “I’m definitely gonna need it…”

Landon was silent for a moment before his eyes suddenly lit up. “Hey, do you know what this means? It’s finally my chance to pay you back!”

Asher furrowed his brow. “For what?”

“Tutoring me in Math.”

A hearty laugh passed his lips as he realized what Landon was getting at. “So… What? You’re gonna tutor me in… sex stuff?”

“Yeah. And no offense, but I think we’ve got a lot of work to do…” Landon teased.

Asher felt his excitement and anticipation from earlier slowly returning, finally eclipsing his embarrassment and fear. “Guess we should get started then… What’s the next lesson?”

With a low, sultry chuckle, Landon pulled Asher back into his arms and they got to work.

Note: I know I didn’t do anything special in this one to mark the occasion, but believe it or not, that was the 600th Ashes to Ashes chapter! 😮 And the day of my next update (Wednesday the 11th) is the four-year anniversary of when I first started this story. Crazy, right??? I still can’t believe it. I just wanted to take a second to sincerely thank everyone who has supported my story over the past 600 chapters! It means so much to me

20 thoughts on “9.21: Mess

    1. Whoops, Asher has a bit of a jealous streak, huh? 😈 Hehehehe

      And yeah, Landon didn’t see it as a big deal, but poor Asher was so humiliated 😂😂😂 Poor kid

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I think Asher sort of said “congratulations” for me xD But congrats on the 600 chapters! ❤

    I did write a longer comment before, but i accidentilly clicked the botton for the previous chapter instead of "post comment". So i lost the comment…

    I just wrote that Landon is really good to Asher and they are lucky to have each other. And I hope that Asher's issues with Ollie won't overshadow their relationship. It seems that Asher thinks of Ollie at the worst times sometimes. But I also thought it was interesting that he thought of Ollie when they talked about past romances. So maybe it truly is in the past?
    I honestly don't know whether I would prefer for Asher to be with Landon or Ollie. I think there are a greater chance for him to keep both men in his life if he is with Landon. But I want him to be truly happy, so he should be with whoever he feels like that with. ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you! And I’m sorry you lost your original comment 😦

      You’re right, Landon is so great to Asher! But Asher’s weird feelings and thoughts about Ollie definitely like popping up at inconvenient times 😬 We’ll see what happens from here… hopefully all three of them can be happy, one way or another! ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Lol! Well, Asher went quickly but that should be okay because Landon doesn’t “need” him for…any thing…except maybe paying him back with something else? 😏😉

    But it looks like they’re going to be having a lot of fun with their tutoring sessions.

    Did you do those poses? So funny and perfect for the situation! 😆

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hehehe yeah, Landon wasn’t too concerned, thankfully! But poor Asher was so embarrassed. Good thing he has a tutor to help him figure things out now 😉 Haha

      And I didn’t make them, though if I couldn’t find good ones, I was prepared to! But I lucked out 😁

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha! Yes, while Asher was in the bathroom, Landon had to wash his own hands 😂 (thankfully most of it got on Landon’s hand and Asher’s pants… the couch was saved!)

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Congratulations on 600 chapters and almost 4 yrs. on the story. That is quite an accomplishment and I only wish I could hang with a story that longs.

    Poor Asher, how embarrassing for him, but aren’t all first encounters awkward? Even for experienced people. I’m glad Landon handled it tactfully. I hope they work things out. I can’t wait to see how Ollie and Penny are doing too. So much going on and can’t wait to read more.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! I kinda can’t believe I’ve been doing this for so long!

      And you’re right — everyone’s first encounter is awkward! As Asher painfully learned… 😂 Landon was very understanding because he’d been there before with Riley. And he’s more than willing to give Asher some practice 😉

      We will see both Ollie and Penny in the next chapter! Though not really together… you’ll see 😉 I’m glad you’re looking forward to more! Thank you very much for reading ❤️❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

    1. HEHEHE I kinda had way too much fun writing this one, can’t lie! 😂 Poor Asher…

      And thank you! I can’t believe I’ve been writing about this messed-up family for so long!


  4. WOoow! Congrats on the 600 episodes!That’s a whole lot. lol

    Okay, Asher, no need for embaressement now.Yeah, you might, um…have been a bit too quick to shot the bullet, but hey, it was your first time. Remind me of na article I read once, saying that usually men had this issues because they got used to doing things fast so to not get caught by their parentes and relatives. It seems to apply to this case!

    Also, yeah, I was nervous about Landon’s parents.It’s not even in the ”akward” zone, more on the ”actually dangerous” kinda thing. I mean, Landon stayed that deep in the closet for so long for a reason, right?

    As much as I hope this two work out, since they seemed to be so good together, buuuut I can kinda see then being a once-time flare, and Asher ending up with Ollie, since he still seemes to be hung up on him, just like Landon is hung up on his ex. I mean, it’s not one of the best things in the world to start a new realtionship while thinking about the previous you had (Or in Asher’s case, his first romantic interrest.)

    Oooh, giving back the math help with sex, kinky. Lol. Also, I just can’t shake the feeling that there’s some kind of porn out there with this exact plotline. LOL.”Oh, you were so good with my math problems…maybe I can help you in some other way….”( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) lol.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! Yeah, I can’t believe I’ve written so many 😱 it’s insane! Haha

      And yes, Asher has never had anybody else touch him before, so that amped up the excitement a TON and, well… we know what happened 😂

      On a more serious note, you’re right that the situation with Landon’s parents (especially his dad!) seems pretty bad, and that there’s the potential for disaster ahead for these two too! 😬 Asher certainly seems hung up on Ollie (more on that in some of the next few chapters!) but we’ll see…

      And LMAO oh god, you’re right, that does sound like a bad porn plot 😂😂😂😂😂

      Liked by 1 person

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