6.63: Interlude – Grateful

Come on… Any minute now… Harper kept telling herself as she stood up for what felt like the thousandth time. She’d been waiting for one of the guards to knock on her door all afternoon, and kept rising to her feet in anticipation… But there had still been no sign.

“Jesus, will you take a chill pill, deaf girl?” Katie laughed. “You’re giving me anxiety over here.”

“Sorry… Just excited, I guess.” She shrugged almost guiltily, sitting back on her bed once more.

“Um, yeah. I can tell.” Her roommate shook her head in apparent amusement. “I get it though. Must be nice having a visit you can look forward to so much…” Katie’s face seemed to fall for a moment. “But why don’t you go take a walk or something while you wait, instead of sitting around here driving me insane?” Her usual smirk quickly found its way back on her face as she spoke.

Harper couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, okay… not the worst idea.” She agreed as she rose to her feet yet again — this time with purpose.

“Be sure to tell them that their favorite former classmate says hello.” Katie teased as Harper headed for the door.

She replied with a laugh. “Uh-huh. I’ll be sure to do that.”

Harper was still bursting with excitement as she began making her way down the nearly-deserted corridor. She hadn’t seen Rylie and Devin in so long — not since Jocelyne’s funeral. She just couldn’t wait to see their faces again. Hear their voices. Feel their warmth. Her stomach did somersaults at the thought.

There had been so little for Harper to feel truly happy about since her grandmother’s death. It was hard not to relish in the joy she felt in that moment. It was nice to finally feel a bit of genuine happiness again.

But as she passed by the last door at the end of the hallway, she felt her heart sink, and the butterflies in her stomach all seemed to fly away.

Part of her almost wanted to knock. She knew Elly was off with her husband for their conjugal visit… Ivy would be alone. This could be the perfect opportunity to finally talk, couldn’t it? Harper asked herself. And I still owe her an apology, don’t I? 

Things had been so uncomfortable between them since Harper’s outburst last week. Ivy still sat with her and Katie at all their meals, and made her usual small talk with them… But everything felt so different now. Harper had foolishly hoped that she could just sweep their argument under the rug, but the more time that passed, the more impossible that seemed.

Harper had to try and explain herself, didn’t she? She had to help Ivy understand… The problem wasn’t her. Not really, anyway.

It’s me. I’M the one who fucked up… Ugh! I’ve gotta talk to her. With a slow, deep breath, Harper finally lifted her fist to knock.

“Harper Rosebrook?” She practically jumped at the sound of a deep voice from over her shoulder.


“You have visitors.”


“Okay, I’m still not sure if I can wrap my head around this…” Rylie laughed softly.  “So you’re actually friends with Bitchface now? Remind me again how that happened?”

Harper’s smile faltered at Rylie’s words. All the joy and relief she’d felt at finally seeing her friends again was momentarily tainted by a small burst of anger that rushed through her. 

It was a strange feeling. How many hours had she spent with the two of them making fun of Katie when they were teenagers? Hell, Rylie had even punched Katie in the face once… And at the time, she’d deserved it! Who would have thought Harper would ever actually wind up defending her former enemy?

“Yes, Katie is my friend, believe it or not.” She replied at last, putting emphasis on her roommate’s real name. “Or at least, I think she is. I’m not really sure how it happened though…” She confessed. “It just sorta… did.

Rylie shook her head in disbelief once more at Harper’s words. But beside her, Devin’s lips curled slightly. Some of the butterflies from before returned at the sight of his smile.

“It’ll definitely take some getting used to… But I think it’s great.” He said seriously. “I’m sure you need friends to get by in a place like this.”

“You really do.” Harper agreed, her face suddenly falling. Devin’s mention of ‘friends’ had brought to mind her earlier moment of indecision outside of Ivy’s room. “Too bad I keep pushing them away…” She muttered.

A soft sigh passed Rylie’s lips at her words. “Crap. I knew something was up… What happened?”

Oh shit, did I say that out loud? “It’s nothing.” She said quickly.

Rylie almost laughed. “Bullshit. We know something’s wrong.”

For a moment, Harper considered trying to deny it again… But she knew there would be no point. “Is it really that obvious?” She bit her lip.

“Totally.” Devin nodded. “Even before you said anything, we could tell… Still gotta work on that poker face.” He gave a small smile, obviously trying to lighten the mood.

Harper felt herself blushing slightly under their stares. Damn it. How do they still know me so well? “Fine. You caught me…” Her eyes darted back and forth between their beautiful faces for a moment. “I guess I’m kinda having a problem with one of my other friends in here… It’s Ivy. Remember her?”

“That new girl?” Rylie asked.

Enough time had passed that Ivy hardly qualified as ‘new’ anymore, but Harper nodded. “She’s been pretty awesome ever since Oma died. And she knows all this crap about me and what I’ve been through. She’s been great to talk to… But it’s like she never wants to tell me anything about herself in return. Especially how she ended up here… And it annoys the shit out of me.” She sighed. “We got in a fight about it a few days ago.”

Rylie laughed softly in reply. “Well, do you remember how much you used to love opening up about your problems?” She asked sarcastically. “Even to us. And we’re your best friends!”

“Yeah, maybe it’s just not easy for her to talk about that shit?” Devin suggested. “I mean, we all have stuff we don’t like talking about, right? And that’s gotta be even truer for the people in here…”

Harper lowered her head. She’d never thought about it that way… But her friends had a point. She always used to shut everybody out. She never wanted to confide in anyone about her problems — Even the people she cared about the most. So how could she possibly expect Ivy to open up to someone she barely even knew?”

“Ugh. You guys are right.” Harper agreed reluctantly, breaking the silence at last. “But see? I did it again. It feels like I keep fucking everything up…” She paused for a moment, holding her face in her hands as more words suddenly spilled from her lips. “Okay. Maybe that’s not such a new thing. But it’s like all my mistakes are just being shoved in my face again and again ever since Oma died. And I feel awful about it. I wanna make things right. I just don’t know what to do…” Harper felt a sudden tightness in her chest as her emotions started getting the better of her.

She felt a large, warm hand on top of hers for a moment. And though it helped to calm her slighty, somehow the warmth reminded her of Ivy too.

“Hey. Just breathe, okay?” Devin urged her gently before finally pulling away.

Harper nodded gratefully. “Sorry, just… having a moment, I guess.” She muttered, a bit embarrassed.

“This sounds like it’s about a lot more than just Ivy.”

She nodded. “It is. It’s about… God, just everything. My Oma. You guys. Ivy, Katie, Erik, Phoenix… Everything’s just a mess. I feel like I’ve ruined everything. With everybody.” It felt so good to finally get it out. There was so much that had been piling up on her for a long time. “But… If I had to pick one thing that’s really bothering me… I guess it’s my Papa.” Harper confessed softly. “Katie and Ivy keep telling me I’ve gotta talk to him. And I want to. I really do. I just… I don’t know how. And I get so mad anytime anybody brings him up… Because I guess I just don’t know how to deal with it.”

Her two best friends exchanged a quick glance. “We’ll think of something.” Devin assured her. “We’ll figure it out.”

“Yeah.” Rylie agreed. “We’ve still got your back, no matter what.”

Harper returned her friends’ smiles, feeling a familiar warmth rush through her. She still wasn’t sure how she was going to clean up the huge mess she’d made of everything, but it felt good knowing she had people supporting her.

Harper had a lot to be ashamed of… But she tried to remind herself that she had a lot to be grateful for too.

And maybe that would be enough to help her make it through.


37 thoughts on “6.63: Interlude – Grateful

  1. Well, feels like a lot of progress is being made. I don’t really like Rylie and Devin anymore, but at least they’re being helpful. Harper just needs to suck it up and put her pride aside and go talk to people.
    Great chapter!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Definitely a lot of progress! Sorry you’re not liking Rylie and Devin, but glad you like this chapter 🙂 Hopefully Harper can make even more progress from here!


  2. RYLIE AND DEVIN. Finally!!!!!!!

    I missed them. They’re like the only completely decent people in this gen, rofl. Sometimes I really wonder why they’ve stuck with Harper this long.

    I’m glad Harper has finally opened up to them, instead of hiding shit and being paranoid. They’ve been nothing but good friends. And I’m glad they visited her too. ❤

    Thank god she's finally taking responsibility for her own nonsense.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Haha I missed them too! As for why they stick with her, it’s actually something I’ve thought about, and drawn upon my real experiences for. I had a friend who was really frustrating like Harper. She didn’t end up in jail, but she had a mental disorder and did a bunch of crazy and dangerous things. And though we DID reach a point in our lives where I couldn’t take it anymore and our friendship ended (it was when we were in our mid-20s), before that, I kept sticking by her side because she and I had been the very best of friends as teenagers. I knew her in a way I don’t think anyone else did. And I knew that underneath the ridiculous behavior she was still the same friend I loved so much. And I think that’s what Rylie and Devin feel too. They know the girl deep inside. And they still love her.

      Let’s hope Harper keeps opening up and keeps taking responsibility! We shall see…

      Liked by 10 people

  3. Little Harper is finally growing up.
    Rylie and Devin stand by and up to Harper. They are true friends. I just hope Harper has a chance to return the favor someday.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Harper having character development??? Learning from her mistakes??? Recognizing the underlying issues of her outbursts and deciding not to shut people out????? I can’t wait for the scene where she and Zayne talk it out. This is a satisfying arc you’ve created.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. That means a lot to hear, thank you!!! I’m glad this arc feels satisfying so far 🙂 Harper has come a very long way. The saddest thing in all of this is that Joce had to die before she finally had her wakeup call 😦 But it’s definitley seemed to have a profound impact on her Hopefully some progress will be made with Zayne soon.

      Liked by 2 people

  5. I’m sorry, where did Harper go? Who is this mysterious Harper-like creature who is owning up to her mistake and admitting her doubts?

    Seriously though, this is the first time in a LOOOONG time that a Harper-chapter hasn’t had me ready to pull my hair out. It’s so refreshing to see her acting more like herself again. I hope she keeps this up and more than anything, I hope she finds a way to fix – or at least improve – her relationship with her dad. I know some things can’t be completely repaired, but I think that is one of the most important issues that is holding her back currently.

    Also, greetings from a very rainy Italy 🙂

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Hahaha right?? She’s seriously transforming right before our eyes. It feels very good to give her some growth 😉 I agree that her issues with Zayne are totally holding her back. And for once, she’s finally ready to try and face them. But I think it’s a scary step. Hopefully she can find the courage to do it!

      And I will trade you your rain for my snow! We woke up to about a foot of snow this morning here in Maine. Ughhhh 😛

      As always, thanks for reading, sonnie!

      Liked by 3 people

  6. Dark WitcHazard: What have you done with my self destructing Harper you’re making her human again! Why!!!!😭 Is she actually 🤮 going to redeem herself at some point!😱 I need to lie down!

    Anti Shipper: Looks like I’m two out of five Darling! Harik is done and Harlie after this chapter is totally sinking to the bottom of the Citizen Sea as we speak!

    Shipper WitcHazard: Maybe but I still have three!

    Anti Shipper: Get real Unless Harper is introduced to another love interest after her Jail days you have two tops! I don’t know what you’ve been reading but clearly Katie is going to be just a really close enemy turned friend for Harper. I mean have you seen any romantic chemistry between these two cause I haven’t!

    Shipper: Well Friendship can turn to love!

    Anti Shipper: Yeah no she needs some major family love which we know Hozay has plenty to spare so since Katie probably has no place to go after jail time I’m sure she’ll become a unexpected but welcomed resident of the Rosebrook household and a decent Tante Katie to Phoenix! And after she gets over her family trauma she will date again since she hasn’t said whether she’s into girls or bi I suspect sometime in the future little pheonix will get a Uncle so and so!

    Shipper: I guess I’ll wait to see if she chooses Devin or Ivy huh!

    Anti Shipper: Seems like the safest option atm yes!

    Emotional WitcHazard: See Harper is taking steps in the right direction! And I’m sure once she face the biggest obstacle at least starting to repair her relationship with her father everything else will feel so easy in comparison and fall into place! I’m so happy!😆❤️❤️❤️

    Dark WitcHazard:🤮🤮🤮🤮 Somebody make it stop!🤮🤮🤮🤮

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hehehehehe sorry, Dark 😉 😛

      Interesting ship analysis! At the moment, there are still lots of options open 😉 But I do see the points that Anti-Shipper is making haha

      Thanks for reading! And again, welcome back WitcHazards 😛


  7. Ahhhh! My babies! 😍

    And oh…this just makes me pine for Dev x Harper ship. You see? Dev is so sweet! He’s understanding and can help Harper find her way through the mess she’s made. (And through her relationship with Ivy). He doesn’t blame her or think bad things about her or feel he’s better off without her. He comes along side her to help and says wise things. Gah! Okay…I’ll stop wishing here…

    At least she still has these great friends who will support her no matter her faults. I love how Garper is much more open to listening now. She’s finally growing up. Yay!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I love that she’s still getting butterflies from Devin, that’s adorable. I still think she should just hook up with Devin and Rylie and be done with it…

    But I figure Harper/Ivy is going to be a thing now, and I’m fine with that, even if I think Devin is awesome. Devin and Rylie have been amazing friends to Harper no matter what happened. On the one hand, that might make romance too complicated, but on the other, isn’t that exactly the kind of person you’d want to be in a relationship with? Someone who’ll stick by you even when you’re at your lowest?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Great points here! For now, I think Harper’s romantic options are still pretty open… only time will tell who she might get with! 😛

      Thanks for reading! ❤️


  9. I just want to hug her! ❤ She's getting there, slowly but surely.
    Man, just seeing them in the same shot makes me go RYHARPIN! ❤
    I think that ship name changes every time I say it. 😛
    Amazing chapter, per the…use (ush?)! ❤ I really cannot wait for Harper and Zayne to be friends again. They're my precious little beans!


  10. Are we close to the touchy feely part of the arc where everyone is happy again yet XD Where Harper talks to her dad, finds love, and more importantly loves herself again. I’m ready for the happy :3

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ugigigigi I’m sooo happy to see, and be reminded again, how much Harper has grown as a person! Everything finally seems to be working out for her, and all that because she finally realized that it wasn’t the world’s fault..I’m so glad she has such good friends to rely to, and to think that In the beginning, they were merely background characters…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! I’m glad you’re so happy about our girl’s growth! ❤️ And Rylie and Devin have definitely turned out to be something special, huh? ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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