5.26: White Lie

I never knew it was possible to feel like total shit and like you’re on top of the world at the exact same time… But that’s definitely me right now. And, well… It kinda sucks.

I mean, on one hand, I’m insanely excited and basically freaking the fuck out (in the best way). But then I also feel like the worst person in the world for feeling that way. Know what I mean?

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Guess I should explain. Let me back up a bit.

So Charlie, Alex, and Tony’s birthday was last week. And it was a pretty damn important one. They’re finally eighteen. Adults now, as much as Tante Joce doesn’t wanna believe it. She’s been all weepy and emotional about it every time I talk to her! Typical, right?

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Anyway, they all did stuff with their friends last week to celebrate. It was all over Facebook. Tony and her friend Rebecca had a sleepover (LAME). Charlie and a small army of her ditzy little followers went out to get their nails done and have dinner (Stupid girl stuff). Alex took a few girls from her football team to the arcade and out for some drinks (The only celebration that didn’t completely suck). And they all seemed to have a good time or whatever.

But Tante Joce still insisted on having some stupid family dinner last night. And she invited everybody, of course. Elliot, Emma, and Adam. Onkel Auggy and Onkel Noah. Tante Clara, Onkel Florian, and Rory. Remi and River… And me (duh).

But… That was the problem.

Like two days after Tante Joce told me about the dinner, Victoria texted me and invited me to go to her friend’s party with her. Yes — that Victoria! Crazy, right? I was so sure I was dreaming when I got that message. But I wasn’t. I couldn’t believe it! I mean, we’ve been talking back and forth for a little while, I guess. But this was different. I could feel it

So I told her I’d be there, of course. How the hell could I say no? And I was SO excited…

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Until I realized the party was the same night as the dinner. Of course it was. Because nothing’s ever that easy.

What the hell was I gonna do?!

Basically I either had to miss out on my chance with Victoria, or let everybody down by picking her instead.

So I ended up choosing the third option.

I lied.

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I called Tante Joce and told her I had to work that night, and that no one would switch shifts with me. She was so sad… But she told me she understood. The girls had pretty much the same reaction when I told them too… And I felt really shitty at first.

But I mean, what else could I say?

I figured it wouldn’t be a huge deal. Like I said, the girls already went out with their friends to celebrate. Why should they care about whether or not I’m at some dumb family dinner? I knew they wouldn’t. But I knew Tante Joce would. So I had to come up with an excuse.

So last night, I stopped by the house to say hi and drop off the presents I got for them. Then I headed off to work my “shift”.

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And it was amazing. I hung out with some old friends, made some new ones, and had Victoria practically attached to my hip the entire night. I don’t think a girl has ever given me that much attention before, y’know? I seriously didn’t want the night to end.

But the best part was right before I headed home. Victoria invited me to dinner Friday night at the new sushi place on Main Street… Just the two of us. Like… a date. A friggin’ DATE!

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That was when I felt like I just had to be dreaming.

But when I got back home… Well, that sure as hell woke me up.

I checked my phone, and I had a text from Charlie. Just one. But it was enough to make me feel like a total and absolute piece of shit.

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I know you lied. It said. Fuck you.

Why the hell did she even give a damn? It was just some stupid family dinner. We have tons of those every year. And how did she even find out anyway?

So I messaged her back and got the full story. I guess everybody felt really bad that I had to work and miss the party… So while everyone was busy cleaning up or heading home, Charlie drove down to the restaurant to surprise me with a piece of birthday cake.

But of course, I wasn’t there. My boss told her I wasn’t even scheduled to work til Wednesday.

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I think I’ve apologized about a hundred times since last night. And I think she doesn’t hate me. Maybe. Or at least, she’s a little calmer now than she was before. And I think I convinced her not to tell anybody the truth about what happened. So… That’s good, isn’t it?

I dunno. This whole thing is just a mess.

01-22-17_12-40-42-am

I’m so happy about Victoria. I’m so excited for our date Friday night. And I just keep trying to tell myself I did the right thing by going to that party.

But if I really did the right thing…

Why do I still feel so damn guilty?

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64 Responses to 5.26: White Lie

  1. Senna says:

    “Why do I still feel so damn guilty?”

    Because your little white lie grew enough to become a black and blue one? Because you chose a woman over your family who loves you very much? Because you broke the trust of your cousin, and possibly everybody else if they all find out (Who’s to say Charlie isn’t pissed enough to do so)?

    Really, I could go on and on. But basically, Zayne’s got quite a few reasons to feel guilty. 😡

    Liked by 4 people

  2. julyvee94 says:

    Wow Zayne is really going down the rabbit hole now. Boooooooo. He’ll admit how shitty his behaviour was soon enough.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. shamanarza says:

    Lie enough, disappoint enough people, push enough people away and you’ll build up a nice emotional callus. That’ll solve all those pesky guilty feelings!

    Liked by 3 people

  4. azzywoods says:

    Zayne, you little fuck.

    I bet Charlie rats. And if she does, serves him right.

    Liked by 2 people

    • shamanarza says:

      I don’t think Charlie will rat. Lie of omission, sure. Possibly hand him more shovels to dig himself a deeper hole, maybe. But if she does crack, it will be way too late and way too serious for a stern talking-to and a family hug can fix.

      It is the Rose rooks, after all…

      Liked by 1 person

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      It’s a definite possibility. She’s so upset at him 😦 I feel bad for her

      Like

  5. witchazard says:

    Wow wow wow! I thought I was going to be using the Double Penalty Clause soon, but to think it would be in the same update! Back up Zayne Mount Charlie’s gonna blow! I’m pretty sure it goes without saying what type of strikes this chapter got😜

    Liked by 1 person

  6. audreyfld says:

    Zayne…when are you going to grow up and realize the choices you are making are so wrong…I am glad Charlie sent him that message. He deserved it! I have to say my sympathy for him is just about gone. He should feel guilty. He keeps trying to rationalize everything he does. He will soon lose everyone’s trust. His family and Victoria because they all will find out he has been lying to them the whole time. 😠 It will take a long time to earn it back. He is so in over his head.

    Liked by 1 person

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      It’s ok to lose sympathy. He has been digging himself deeper and deeper into a hole. And I think he KNOWS how awful he’s being, he just does want to admit it to himself, unfortunately :-/

      Like

  7. CitizenErased14 says:

    “Selfish little fuck” is the perfect description for him right now :-/ He messed up so bad.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. sourocha1 says:

    And let me say, that i don’t think Victoria will be very pleasead at knowing that she is starting in a relationship with someone that lied about their age, and about university…really, zayne, what are you expecting form this relation? That she will never ask why he is never on the college halls, or other stuff…and about the family dinner, Zayne, this things metter, you never know if someone is internazing something, and even the smallest thing can break they…

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Spottydog714 says:

    *munches popcorn very quietly*

    ‘Tony and her friend Rebecca had a sleepover (LAME).’ You’re just jealous that Tony has the guts to spend time with her loved ones instead of trying to be cool.

    This doesn’t half remind me of the parable of The Prodigal Son. I bet it will end the same way too.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Simslover163 says:

    “Why do I still feel so damn guilty?”

    Look out, pal. Here comes the Lying Express and you already got yourself a ticket to Liar Land, where liars go. The more lies you create, the more problems you create! You think you can get away with lying. Duh! No! Eventually, someone will find the truth and he or she will get mad. Remember there are SOME good lies you can tell! For example, someone has been borrowing money from you and has never returned the favor. You can tell this person has trust issues. The next time he or she asks to borrow money, you can simply say you don’t have any, even though you have some.

    All those lies you told. They’re down to the earth HORRIBLE, especially you lying to Victoria about your age! 😡😡😡😡😡

    Zayne better stop all those horrible lying before it’s too late. I shall close with this remark for him: Pack it in, buck up, and get out of La La Land before you are dead meat!!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. megiare says:

    Victoria….she has a connection to the family or so I feel like.

    Like

  12. theplumbob says:

    Well, to say something positive, I did like how we got another snippet of the girls’ personalities from how they chose to celebrate their birthdays (also enjoyed Zayne’s description of that, haha!).

    As for the rest… well you go ahead and keep telling yourself it was just a stupid dinner, Zayne. I’m sure if you repeat it a couple more times, it will be true. Lol!

    Liked by 2 people

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      I’m glad you found something positive to say amongst Zayne’s selfish idiocy 😛 I liked showcasing the girls’ personalities a bit there too 🙂

      Like

  13. raerei says:

    Oh dear Zayne, lol. I love how you feel like you’re drowning and ecstatic at the same time. Cuz you are drowning. This life is too much for you and the sooner to realize it the sooner you can stop drowning. Before it’s too late.

    I agree with Plumbob, love how you snuck in the triplets personalities and Zayne’s reaction to them in here. And I was impressed that Charlie drove out to give him cake at work! Shows, despite everything she thinks, she really cares about him.

    Liked by 1 person

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      Yes, Charlie really does love Zayne a lot, and that was so sweet of her. Little did she know…

      And goodness yes, Zayne is drowning! Someone throw this kid a life preserver!

      Like

  14. Jes2G says:

    I decline to rant on this chapter. I am so done with this guy.

    Poor Victoria. She doesn’t deserve this. 😉 She really doesn’t.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. theceltygirly says:

    I agree with Charlie, Fuck you, Zayne XD
    If I were Charlie, I’d be a little petty and tell all of his friends that he’s still a kid. (Probably not, but the idea is appealing.)
    Oi, he needs a big ol’ slice of reality to hit him in the face, make a new scar or something. Then every time he looks at it, it reminds him not to be an idiot.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. maladi777 says:

    Why couldn’t he tell Charlie that he had a date (sort of)? She might have undestood. She has a boyfriend after all. The way Zayne talks about his cousins and their activities with derision makes me look forward to the moment when he falls from his skies.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. kaffepigen says:

    That’s what you get from lying to your familly Zayne. Tsk tsk… 18 years is quite a big deal and you should have been at the dinner. I bet victoria would have understood it better than you think.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. I just officially caught up! I don’t know how to feel =( And Zayne.. Mates before dates. Victoria might be for a few months but your cousins will be their for life. Sorry Zayne but I agree with Charlie this time.
    Voice: This causes more drama!!!!
    Me: Go away! I was trying to be serious! -.-

    Liked by 1 person

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      Congrats on catching up! You are awesome 😀 (And if it helps, I post four new chapters a week! So you never have to wait long haha. Chapters come out every Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday ^_^)

      And yes, this was such a shitty move on Zayne’s part : (

      Like

      • Glad to hear there are going to be lots of chapters! If you are ever late though expect me to be getting sweaty eyes in the comments =’)
        I have loved reading dust to dust and ashes to ashes sooooo much! You are an amazing writer and I hope to see millions of chapters in the future. I also love how you talk to us so much even when we are having conversations with voices inside our heads! Thank you xxx

        Liked by 1 person

        • CitizenErased14 says:

          That’s so sweet of you! I’m really happy you’ve enjoyed my stories! And I love talking to the people who comment ^_^ You guys are amazing and take the time to read. The least I can do is take the time to reply to you when you leave me a comment ❤

          Thank you again. See you with a new chapter Thursday 😉

          Liked by 1 person

  19. Brass Buckles says:

    Oh boy. Zayne, that is NEVER a good idea. I mean even if you ditched your family to spend time with this girl, well, Victoria probably won’t look at you as a long term romance once she finds out. I mean, who wants to marry a guy who ditches his family to go have fun with someone else? And thanks to all the lies he couldn’t even invite Victoria along to the party.

    The more lies he tells, the worse it’s going to be for him. And I have the feeling we have not seen the worst of it yet. Charlie’s going to do something, surely. Even if she only tells the other two girls… and that’s going to make THEM furious with him too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Brass Buckles says:

      By not inviting her to the party I meant as an alternative to the date. Had he not told so many lies, he could maybe have asked her to come over to his cousins’ birthday party. Not that he would have. Of course if he hadn’t lied, she’d also know he’s only 17 and she might not be into him!

      Liked by 1 person

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      You are so right about Zayne’s lies. The deeper he gets in all this, the harder it will be… :-/

      Like

  20. Colourofmusic says:

    Zayne, cmon man. I thought you knew better than this. Just stop lying to everyone. This is all going to end so bad.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. peacesign101 says:

    Nice job Zayne. This isn’t even about you, yet you made it so and acted selfish. 3 people who care about you so dearly are celebrating a really important event in their life and you blow it off just for a girl?! Those people have made countless sacrifices for your happiness and you repay them with idiocy :/ I’m honestly really disappointed with him.

    Also, I didn’t realize until now, but I bet something really bad is going to happen between Zayne and Charlie. Charlie is always saving his butt and being nice to him, when he’s done nothing in return (or at least nothing I can think of off of the top of my head). And Charlie doesn’t seem like the type of person who will let it slide after a while…

    Liked by 1 person

  22. fabtiffsim says:

    Meh! Me and my husband lie to our family all the time!

    Liked by 2 people

  23. Lia says:

    Oh no! ☹️ I am so hooked on your writing that I binge-read over the weekend, and now I find that I have to wait for the next chapter to find out how Zayne is going to make it up (or not) to his family, so double ☹️

    On another note, I love love love the Rosebrook family and am super amazed at how you can come up with such characters who have made me laugh and cry together with every part of their lives (at least what has been written down)!

    Thank you for your lovely characters and screenshots that really complete the story!

    Liked by 1 person

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      Oh thank you so much for reading my story! I appreciate you taking the time to read (and I’m impressed you did it so quickly!) and I’m so happy you love my Rosebrooks! ❤

      I have a chapter coming out today, actually (I release four a week!) so you will never have to wait too long for a new chapter ^_^ Thank you again!

      Like

      • Lia says:

        Haha I can’t wait for the next chapter already! Thanks so much for writing these lovely characters, I find their emotions and reactions so authentic in the situations 🙂 my husband has been telling me not to cry so much in the last few days while I was doing the binge catch-up on Dust to Dust and A2A :p

        Like

  24. Yessssssss, Zayne…… Keep digging and digging……I’ll just be off popping popcorn while you use your “delivery” money to buy more rope to hang yourself with. Yesssssssss…..

    Liked by 1 person

  25. misfit913 says:

    Zayne should have just told the truth. But I guess the Rosebrooks never learn lol! Oh, and I loved the shot of the mouse lol!!

    Liked by 1 person

  26. lisabeesims says:

    Lying lips sink ships … looks like his is going down

    Liked by 1 person

  27. SpurklyNinja says:

    Oh dear… Fucking hell, Zayne. Seriously?

    If I facepalmed any harder, there’d be a hole in my head. 😛

    Liked by 1 person

  28. addbratlove225 says:

    The arc slogan still stands. ZAYNE. NO. Rest in peace Zayne and most other Rosebrooks.

    Liked by 1 person

  29. kaycee39 says:

    It’s unfortunate that I am not surprised by this. He has proven to be a little ungrateful POS. OMG he makes me so mad most of the time. Why does he feel like he doesn’t need his family? Hell they are all he has. Why cant he see and appreciate that. If I were to have lost my parents like him I would spend every waking moment with my family because you never know when they could be taken away from you. Ahhhhhh he makes me mad, sorry. Rant over. I need to go call my Mom haha.

    Like

    • CitizenErased14 says:

      Haha it’s okay, a lot of people really dislike Zayne so you are not alone in being angry at him!

      He hates relying on others. His whole life, he’s been the poor little orphan boy in the eyes of basically every adult. And Joce has smothered and coddled him quite a bit. It makes him upset because he wants to prove to people that he’s not the poor little weak kid and that he can do things on his own.

      Not that that excuses what an ungrateful little jerk he is, but it’s an important part of his personality (which never fully goes away, unfortunately). He has a very strange, almost contradictory personality haha on the one hand, he wants to be independent and prove himself. On the other, he’s very insecure and feels like a failure when he fails. He is a ball of angst who often takes those negative feelings out on others 😂

      Liked by 1 person

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