4.3: That’s All

Around this same time every year, I always talk about how excited I am for the new season to start.

Well this year, I think I’m more excited than I’ve ever been.

I just feel like I need to get away from it all right now. Get out of the house, throw myself back into my work… Maybe that’ll help me feel better. Or at least, I really hope it does. Because I’m really not sure what else I can do right now.

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Things have been getting a little better around here since grandpa died. It’s been a few weeks, and I think we’re all finally learning to adjust.

Vovó’s finally starting to smile more.

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And so is Mama.

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Clara’s back to work on that little blog of hers.

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Jocelyne’s spending more time with her friends again.

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Lucas has been working with Florian on getting their new band off the ground.

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And Gus, well… He’s still his cheery little self, making us all laugh and smile as always.

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Everyone’s doing great right now, all things considered. None of them are the problem…

It’s Colette. As usual.

Nothing’s getting better since the last time I wrote. I think it may be even WORSE. She’s still so goddamn moody and distant. And – are you ready for this? – tomorrow it’ll be TWO months. TWO MONTHS since we’ve had sex. Do you know how damn frustrating it is to have to “take care of things” on my own all the time? Jesus, I feel like I’m fifteen again!

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But the worst thing is that I’m pretty sure there’s a part of me that doesn’t even miss it. I mean, for a while our sex life has been so… boring. Empty. It started to almost feel like a chore. Maybe that’s why we stopped. I’m not sure, I guess.

I remember when things were fun, y’know? Exciting. Passionate. Colette always used to know how to drive me crazy…

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And now she’s driving me crazy for a totally different reason.

I even resorted to telling my Bruder about it – I mean, who else can I talk to about something like this? Stefan says I need to talk to Colette… But believe me, I’ve TRIED. And every time, it’s the same damn fight again and again.

“What’s wrong with you? Is sex ALL you care about?”

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I always end up backing down after that.

But you know what I’d REALLY love to say to her?

“Well you know what? For a while, sex was the only fun part of our marriage. So yeah, I care a whole fucking lot thank you very much. Except now you’ve somehow managed to suck the life out of that too, just like you do with everything else.” 

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Look. I love my wife. More than anything, except maybe my kids. She’s everything to me. She is. I just…

Well, it’s like I said, going back to work will help. I just need to have a little time away from all this. Clear my head a little.

That’s all.

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56 thoughts on “4.3: That’s All

  1. Oh noooo…. Not #TeamToCo 😦
    I guess that can happen when you’ve been together for so long… But still. It’s really sad. I just hope that they can get through this. I really love them and they’ve been through so much together. Then again, they both had to grow up so fast when Colette became pregnant, I don’t blame Tobi for missing the ‘fun and exciting’ part of a relationship (also, Tobi getting frustrated about having to take care of things himself for two months was really funny :P)

    Maybe they should go in couple’s therapy. Or just have a few good, long talks with each other.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I am breaking my own heart writing these chapters 😦 They’re going through a really hard time right now, and I think you hit the nail on the head about them growing up too fast (there is actually a chapter coming that’s all about that haha).

      And yes that part was a little funny hehehe. I think couple’s therapy would help a lot. Hopefully they can eventually reach that step…


    1. Trust me, this is painful for me too 😦 They are going through a real rough patch in their relationship right now. We’ll see whether they make it through…


    1. Hahahaha I think you missed a few chapters, but you didn’t miss much with #ToCo… Sorry for this one. They’re having a really hard time right now :-/ And it breaks my heart to write it.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Whoa. Pause. Stop the bus! I am thoroughly confused. I don’t recall him writing anything about this the last time he wrote…whenever that was. The only time I recall them having any problems was that little line Jocelyn threw in quietly that you thought we all missed lol. I mean, I get it. Marriages go through things like this all the time, but I feel like this is really sudden and he’s expecting me to remember something I don’t remember. Help!


    1. Hahaha this is the first time we’ve read anything from Tobi’s journal in nine years.

      The “last time he wrote” is a journal we never saw (since he’s been keeping a journal “off camera” ever since Gen 3, we just jumped ahead haha). It does feel kind of sudden probably, but a lot can change in nine years, most of which we haven’t gotten to see…

      Liked by 1 person

        1. If it helps, writing this story arc has been seriously breaking my own heart 😦 But it feels right for them to be at this point right now, given the past of their relationship… More on that in the next Tobi chapter 😛

          Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh Tobi you poor thing. NOT #TEAMTOCO! Colette, your sweetie wants to be with you and you’re moody?? Geez! Looks like you got up on the wrong side of this bed this morning. Count sheep next time you sleep! I guess therapy and long talks are the solutions.

    I’m glad to see Clara, Jocelyne, and Lucas doing their usual activities (Will we ever hear Lucas’s POV?). I just thought of something to add what I said yesterday. Clara could be one of those biker babes or biker chicks. Maybe one day she’ll own her own motorcycle and do a photoshot with it, wearing those leather boots, leather pants, skull shirts, tattooes (if she plans to get one), and leather gloves, along with those piercings and that radical hairstyle.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hahahaha that image of biker-chick Clara made me smile! ^_^

      Yeah, I feel awful for doing this to #ToCo 😦 Hopefully they’ll find a way to work through this, but we’ll see…

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Is it just me, or is there a little tiny smiley face at the bottom of this page?

    Nope, defiantly not trying to distract myself from the possible sinking of #TeamToco. Nope. Not at all.

    Seriously, why are you torturing us and you in this way? Where did this idea come from? (I’m not criticizing you, I am genuinely curious!)

    ‘Clara’s little blog’ I wouldn’t describe it like that… XD

    And your heirs have friends that we actually meet! This is awesome! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha the “idea” just came from the natural progression of a relationship like theirs. They never had a chance to be kids together or have a real relationship — within one year of their first kiss, they were married with two kids. After a while, it’s gonna take its toll, unfortunately 😦 Especially factoring in Tobi’s super busy career…

      And yes, we will get to know the Gen 4 friends a bit! 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I guess this would happen. I didn’t predict it, but now it happened I get it. They both never got to experience the natural progression of a teenage relationship because she got pregnant so quickly and they were concerned with creating the best environment for their kids.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yup 😦 Unfortunately true! And for a while, it was fine — having the twins to raise offered a good distraction from it all. But now that their kids are older and THEY’RE older, a lot of their underlying issues are coming to the forefront :-/

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, it’s tough 😦 They’re in a rut right now. I think it’s kind of to be expected, giving their unusual start to their relationship/marriage *sigh* 😦

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for your insight! I’m glad you can understand why this is such an issue for Tobi. I hope they work it out too! Time will tell…

    And you’re not the first to guess Colette might be cheating! We will see her side of things in a few chapters and find out a bit more of what’s happening on her end. Thank you so much for reading, as always!


  7. Oh my… It is as I feared. Fighting all the time can really drain your energy and especially your sex drive. For the last couple of picture, just before the very last, i thought perhaps Tobi would sleep on the couch instead.

    I really think they married too young. And got pregnant when they were too young. I know it definitely wasn’t planned or anything, but if it had been a planned pregnancy i would say they should have waited at least until they knew each other better, were at least 20 y old OR had lived together for a while. It seems to me thattheir marriage is spiralling out of course and the reasons to fix it are disappearing. Loving someone just isn’t enough. You need good communication, connection and a sexlife is definitely a bonus. Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship, but if you never have it, you end up losing that intimacy and deep connection that bound you together in the first place.

    Anyway, long rant (sorry about that). I hope they don’t end up with a divorce. I also have a feeling that Colette is hiding something from Tobi. And that she in a way is covering that up (and her emotions) with fighting. If so, sooner or latet she will have to come clean. I just fear it will be too late.

    Okay done 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you your insightful comment! I think marrying and becoming parents so young is really the root of their problems. They need to work it out and find the spark in their marriage again…

      Hopefully it’s not too late :-/

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I just read through all the other comments (i always comment before reading others comments) and my first thought about some possible secrecy on her part was cheating as well. It would definitely cause a lot of drama. I must say, that even though i feel bad for Tobi, i kinda like that you added this drama to the story. It fits well and makes great reading. Well done!

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Thanks! I’m glad these marriage troubles feel fitting to the story. As for the cheating question, we’ll see soon whether or not it’s happening! 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  8. Well I have to say you have written a very believable story arc. It would be more difficult to believe the ‘happily ever after’ bit in such a realistic drama. So I applaud the twist and can’t wait to get to the bottom of it. My predictions are as follows…she feels old and unattractive…that would put a damper on any girls intamacy….she could feel somehow neglected by our stud muffin…if someone else is providing the attention then she may be cheating…or it could be as simple as something medical….anyhoo…if may be really way off. However hugs for such a great gen already ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Lee! I’ve been planning this arc for a while, and it breaks my heart to write, but feels fitting for their situation.

      I like all of your predictions! They are all very plausible, and we will get a little more insight pretty soon into what’s going on with our beloved #ToCo

      Thank you so much! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I’m glad to read something about their marriage, because not a lot has been said about it. They barely had the chance to get to know each other so it doesn’t surprise me that’ll have problems. Maybe they would never have ended up together if it weren’t for the twins. I get the feeling she maybe cheating on him? Drama is good!! Need more angst 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahaha if drama’s what you want, you’ll get it! 😛 Tobi and Colette HAVE known each other since they were children, so it’s not necessarily not knowing each other as much as not having the chance to have a normal relationship. Becoming parents so early is definitely taking its toll!

      And everyone seems to think Colette is cheating! Haha very interesting. You’ll see soon whether or not it’s true 🙂


  10. #Cobi….(I know the official one is ToCo but I’m sticking with mine)…:( . They were so perfect together but realistically, they’ve only been with each other for their whole life. Maybe they should take a (very) short break and then get back together. It might strengthen their relationship…
    I’m too sad to make any reference to Auggy…

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Aww those screenshots at the end… the way he looks at her😍

    Could it be that the two decided to get married on the first place ‘just’ because Colette was pregnant with Stefan’s child? 😓 That maybe they weren’t really in love but driven by lust and passion? (That sounds so creepy😂)

    Damn I hope things get better between these two. I love how you’ve brought this harsh reality of a ‘boring’ marriage into your story! Adds a whole new dimension! (and a ton of drama, too😉)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Colette being pregnant was a big factor in their decision to marry, it’s true! I do think they were really in love though — they fell in love basically when they were like 10 years old hahaha. But they never had the chance for a real relationship. Things moved WAY too fast, and now years later, it’s starting to take its toll… 😦

      I’m glad you enjoy this plotline. It’s very sad to write, but it felt realistic and fitting for their situation, even though it hurts! 😦

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Awe, how sad for the both of them 😦 Something is definitely going on…hmmm…i’m intrigued. It’s a very interesting twist and very believable since life can take a toll on people and stuff can happen that changes everything. I’m sure their children must notice something isn’t right between their parents. I’m looking forward to eventually finding out what’s going on 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad it’s believable! But it’s also very sad to write 😦 And yes, their kids can definitely sense that something’s up! Jocelyne made a small mention of it in her first journal. But she’s kind of in Denis about it haha.

      Thank you for reading!


      1. It would’ve been sad 😦 they were the quiet but loving and cute couple last time, that ended up bringing some peace between Mari and Diego. I never really noticed the small mention before in Jocelyne’s diary, but now I do. You’re very good at being sneaky 😛 Well done 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Florian ❤

    How long have Tobi and Colette been together for? I guess it doesn't take that long to start feeling stuck in a rut. Especially if you haven't been with anyone else prior to that, and were sort of "pushed" into the relationship by circumstances. I know it didn't feel like that was what happened for Tobi and Colette when they got married – they were young, in love, and finally broke away from the chains of their parents forbidding them from being together. Anybody would be drunk on that feeling in their shoes. But they glossed over a lot of other relationship stages because of it all. I guess what made them so strong at first, and made them push through a difficult situation like a teenage pregnancy is what might tear them apart now.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Florian is such a babe omg *sigh*

      Ah, I missed your wonderfully insightful comments!!! Tobi and Colette got married when he was 17 and she was 18. They’ve been married for 16 years now, so nearly half their lives!

      You’re right that their love was most definitely real (and still is!) but over the years they’re really starting to lose sight of their relationship and get bored with each other. You’ll get a touch more insight on how they’re both feeling in upcoming chapters, but you already know the heart of it haha. They have both never been with anyone else and missed out on a lot of the “normal” parts of a relationship that many take for granted! 😦


  14. You managed to keep Florian in the picture!!! 😀
    Also, damn, marital problems. Looks like the tables will turn. Stefan has his dream life, and things are about to get complicated for Tobi boy over here.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha yes! Couldn’t get rid of cute little Florian ^_^ (who has now grown up into big hunky Florian 😂)

      And yes, Tobi’s life has always been so perfect up until now… but it looks like things could be going downhill :-/


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