3.41: Believe It or Not

Okay, as happy as I am to be an Onkel again… I never realized how much I did not miss the sound of a crying baby, or the smell of a dirty diaper.

At least it’s only one this time. And little Augustin is pretty damn adorable.

That name’s such a damn mouthful though. Colette named him after her grandfather, and no one seems to be able to decide on a good nickname for the poor little guy.

Jocelyne suggested “Gus”. Tobi, Colette, and my grandparents love it. Personally I think it’s kinda boring.

Clara and Lucas voted for “Auggy”. Tobi and Colette say no friggin’ way… But me, Mama, and Jonas think it’s pretty damn hysterical.

Anyway, we’re all really excited about the new baby around here, and I know Josh is excited to finally get to meet little Auggy for himself. His flight’s supposed to come in tomorrow afternoon.

Tobi’s really looking forward to having him see the baby, and I am too, but… Well, believe it or not, I think he might be more excited about it than I am.

Now don’t get me wrong. I love seeing Josh. It feels like ages since the last time we saw him. And the rest of the family has really been warming up to him… Especially the kids. Hell, it’s starting to feel like they’re more excited than me and Tobi combined whenever Josh is in town.

And at least I don’t have Mama to worry about… Not anymore. I mean, she’s still been avoiding Josh as much as she can whenever he comes to visit. But when she does see him, she’s been nothing but polite to him, just like she promised all those months ago.

And in return, well… Tobi and I have been trying our best not to push things. We know we fucked up the first time… And we promised we’d never do it again. No more springing visits on her last-minute. No inviting Josh over without asking. No trying to bring Clara along unless we check with her first.

We’ve been doing our best to keep up our end of the bargain… And I think it’s helping. I mean, she let Josh take Clara to the zoo with us last time he was here. It’s something, right?

I dunno. I should be happy things are finally calming down. I should be happy to be seeing my Vater again. I guess it just feels like no matter what I do, nothing will ever be easy. Nothing will ever be normal. And I’ll never be –

I don’t know. It’s probably the stress talking.

I mean between the new baby, job interviews (that one last week totally fell through. Fuck.), and Christmas coming up… It’s a lot going on.

I’m sure I’ll feel better once all this crap blows over…

Right?