Well, I never thought I’d see this old thing again.
I know I said I was done making excuses or giving explanations, but… This time, I think I owe you one.
Looks like the last time I wrote anything was about a month and a half before Mariana was born… And at first, I was just too busy to find the time to write anything. Guess that’s what first-time parenthood does to you, huh?
And once things settled down a bit, I wanted to get back to writing… But I couldn’t find this journal anywhere. And believe me, I tore the house apart.
I guess it was just buried in the back of the closet for all these years. Mess, clutter, disorganization… yet another side-effect of first-time parenthood… And second-time parenthood too, come to think of it…
Anyway, I was so upset when I couldn’t find it, because there was just so much I was dying to write about. I know I could have started up a new one, but I could never bring myself to do it. There’s something special about this journal… To me, at least. Replacing it just didn’t feel right.
I know I haven’t been great about keeping up with it over the years, but it felt so good to get my thoughts down on these old pages, you know? And once I wasn’t able to do it anymore, I really missed it. A lot.
And I guess that’s when it finally hit me – I really love writing.
I don’t know why it took me so long to figure that out… But I’m so glad I did. I’d been trying for years and years to find what I really was good at, and what I really wanted to do. Guess it was kinda under my nose this whole time.
I’ve published a couple of books here and there, and I’ve been working for the local paper for almost eight years now. And you know what? It’s absolutely amazing. I get to meet so many interesting people, and even travel a little bit every now and then. But I think the most important thing I’ve learned through my job over the years is this – Everyone has a story. Sometimes you’ve gotta dig a little bit to find it, but it’s there.
And my job is sharing those stories with the world.
But, uh… Speaking of sharing stories, I guess I should probably get back to mine, huh?
So where was I? Oh yeah… Mariana. My bright and, er… spirited little girl. She’s always been a feisty one, even back when she was just a baby. But so adorable and smart, too. She was perfect. Jade and I fell in love with her right away.
Our whole lives changed after that – for the better, of course. But being a parent isn’t easy… And damn, is it tiring. We tried for a while to keep up with all the parties Jade’s friends still loved inviting us to, but, well…
When you stay up until 3am with a crying baby one night, it makes staying up until 3am getting wasted the next night a Hell of a lot harder… and less fun.
Now, it’s not like we don’t still talk to those guys, or hang out every now and then. I mean, we had a kid, we didn’t fall off the face of the damn planet, right? Though I guess it can feel that way sometimes. Especially after Carolina came along.
Still, I love being a dad. I really do. And I can’t wait to be one again. Jade and I just found out a couple of weeks ago that we’ve got another on the way. I can’t help but look at my two little girls, and wonder which one their new sibling will take after.
Mari’s definitely a bit of a spitfire – never afraid to speak her mind, that’s for sure. And she cracks us up all the time.
Lina’s a little quieter, but sweet as anything and always eager to meet new people and make new friends.
Oh, and they’re both so smart – almost fluent in three languages, can you believe it? It’s incredible. Sometimes it’s almost hard to believe they’re related to me. I mean, they don’t get their smarts from me, that’s for sure. I’ve got Jade to thank for that.
Okay, I think I need to stop myself… I’m starting to sound like my mother! I just don’t usually get the chance to brag about my girls that much, I guess.
The point is, things are really great right now… and I’m really happy to finally have my old journal back… Guess I shouldn’t tell Mari that though. She got in a Hell of a lot of trouble with Jade and I, and for good reason. I can’t believe she read this! I’m sure she didn’t understand a lot of it, but still… And then trying to pin it on her sister? Jade and I raised her better than that.
I’ll have to be more careful with where I keep this thing, now that I’m finally using it again.
But just in case…
Mariana Lucia Rosebrook, if you’re reading this, uh… Well, you’d better not be!
(Yeah, still working on that stern-dad thing…)